‘I believe that the purpose of life is to be happy’ Dalai Lama


Artist unknown

Those of you who read this blog regularly might know that I was.. WAS writing a letter a week to David Cameron. I got to writing about nine letters all in all. Campaigning for the rights of abuse survivors. I experienced many feelings on this (difficult) road to justice. Anger, leading to confusion… to disappointment. I did receive a few responses from Downing St. The letters generally said that my concerns had been forwarded to the Health Minister and that Mr Cameron did not have time to meet with me. Oh. Ok then. I suppose my main battle has been with being heard. Or feeling not heard. Then feeling exposed.. then just feeling quite simply disappointed. Changing things whether it is a system or yourself is pretty darn tough and takes a lot of perseverance. And it is also very important that one keeps a check on oneself. Where to draw inspiration from?

Recently I got a book from the library on the influential psychologists Jung’s life. He makes a point about the midlife crisis:

“Jung describes the enchanting case of a very pious man he knew who was a churchwarden. He gradually grew more and more fanatical and intolerant about religious and moral matters until by the time he was 40 he had become ‘a darkly lowering pillar of the church’. Then one night, when he was 55, he suddenly sat up in bed and announced to his wife that he had just realized he was actually ‘a plain rascal’. Apparently then he spent his declining years in a feast of riotous living, wasting most of his accumulated fortune. Jung remarks that he was obviously a likeable person, capable of both extremes’. p77, Jung, Teach Yourself Psychology. 

In life we go through many different changes in our psyche. What Jung teaches is that it’s important to always move forward with the flow of life. To not get stuck in previous stages of development. A directed life being more healthier and fruitful than an aimless one.

Every human connection we make- I believe is for a reason. Lately I have had a few repeated lessons fed to me. Sometimes when history repeats itself I believe perhaps it’s because I did not pay enough attention to learning that lesson the first time. Today I spent the day with an 82 year old political refugee. He has in his lifetime experienced a lot of loss and pain. But when we talked about how he is feeling.. he told me ‘I am happy!’. He gets up.. everyday at 6am and goes for a jog! And is generally pretty happy. For the past three years he has been learning english. Not out of desire but out of situation. He has taught me that none of us are ever too old – we never stop learning.. and it is never too late. Don’t let societal pressure make you believe you are past it. Whatever age you are.

If the body is content, we virtually ignore it. The mind, however, registers every event, no matter how small. Hence we should devote our most serious efforts to bringing about mental peace. Dalai Lama

And so I stopped writing to David Cameron. Because I didn’t believe anymore. In my idea? Or that they would listen and take note? Actually you can stand up and voice an opinion – and it doesn’t matter how much passion is behind it, it doesn’t mean people will listen or indeed care. But that is just another life lesson. And it doesn’t mean one shouldn’t try. It simply means that from time to time – we will all find ourselves dealing with disappointment.  It’s always good to create a different strategy.

Have a good week..

Becki Bx


“Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it.” Salvador Dalí

salvador dali meditative rose
(Life is Beautiful – Salvador Dalí)

So it’s been one month since this How to Change blog series started. I remember it well. January 1st 2013. I had just finished writing the first post. And as I published it – I thought ‘well that’s a positive start to the New Year’ *thumbs up*. And then… unexpectedly I started getting a few tweets “You just appeared in Charlie Brookers Screen Wipe :-/”

A feeling of confusion came over me. Then a few more tweets came my way. And then I felt… a slight anxious chill. I rushed (I digitally rushed) between platforms and opened up the BBC IPlayer my fingers speedily skimming the surface of my keyboard. But when I got there.. my face fell in disappointment as an error code came up *INSUFFICIENT BROADBAND CONNECTION* (or words to that effect). NOOOOOOOOOOOOO. So I would have to wait.. to see what all the complacent smiley icons filling up my timeline meant. Patience. Sigh. In my book, the hardest of the virtues.

So Charlie *tips cap – oi oi Brooker!* nearly got it right – but actually I needed the #nokia so that I could actually tweet my letter to @david_cameron (not McAlpine as suggested). If you’ve been keeping up with my blog/tweets/updates – I’ve so far written four letters to Downing Street. A letter a week inspired by Andy in #shawshankredemption questioning the facilities available for survivors and victims of abuse. I’ve so far received two responses. One acknowledging receipt of my first letter. And the second.. I was very confused about. It was addressed to me. But on cutting opening the envelope the letter hiding inside was actually addressing someone not of my name. Anyway, it is at this point I find myself very confused. Not sure who the man in the letter is.. ? Is this a letter of me being cc’d? Why am I getting a letter from the Deputy Prime Minister when I’ve been writing to the Prime Minister?

So no.. Correspondence Officer. It’s not helpful. It’s really not helpful at all. It could all be explained a bit clearer. What does it all MEAN!? (I’ve not posted this letter on my blog as yet for fear that the letter may be intended for someone else). However, this raises queries – that unless you are educated in politics or have a good understanding of the political system – then from the point of view of a citizen it really does seem like a very baffling one.

So last weeks letter to parliament posed all these questions (and yes I sent a tweet!) and I’m currently (still) waiting for a response. Hmmmm. I still don’t really know if this letter was for me or not. But anyway – good job I do have this #nokia phone – because I’m running my computer from it – which means I can keep writing this blog.. and keep tweeting my petition and obviously my questions to the #askboris strand which I still have yet to receive a response from.

So we’ve covered many topics during January.. mindfulness, relaxation, excuses, hope, failing, fear, believing, illusions and the point of today’s blog is that life changes are not easy. But one must try to remain positive and focused on the end goal point. Float like er a stick on a… stormy river…

You can find my petition HERE please sign and share… !

Screen Shot 2013-02-03 at 17.04.54

#ohDearyme #shawshankredemption

All the best,


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