Working as a foreign teacher is a stressful job. Not only because of the language barrier but managing kids is generally pretty hard work. Especially elementary school kids. Phew. So tonight I decided to embark on my first jjimjilbang experience. For those of you that don’t know (don’t feel stupid…it’s ok.. ) a jjimjilbang is a large public bathhouse (based in Korean towns/cities).. that is split into an area for men and an area for women. It’s nicer than it sounds. It is also a place where you can relax – distress sorry I mean destress and while the week away. Wonderful.
On entry I was issued with two towels and a prison outfit to change into if I should want to sleep. I entered the ladies area – and was greeted by an old Korean lady with only a pair of shorts on. As she continued to tell me in Korean how I should proceed in my venture.. I thought ‘shit..this is a bad idea’ as she ferociously pulled my trousers down..
But what the hell! I’ve got an open mind.. so I continued to tell her I wanted a massage. I thought yeaaah.. – a little treat.. it’s been a hard week – and we managed to agree on the 25000 won price. Not bad. Although of course – I had no idea what I was ordering. As I entered the jimjaebang.. fully naked.. (the other Korean lady had snatched my towel and left me as God had intended) – I showered and was sent to the massage area where I was ordered to lay down on the bed with my face pointing towards the ceiling. And here she proceeded to massage every part of my naked body. As she ran her hands over my face I thought.. ‘mmmm … this woman lurrrves to smoke..’
So as I rolled over onto my front. Of course.. completely relaxed by now…why wouldn’t I be.. I’d just had my breasts massaged for god’s sake.. the lady climbed upon me.. straddled me and gave me the most painful massage I’ve ever experienced. Then she pulled herself up.. (let me point out that she has of couse got only her knickers on) and continued to walk across my back. She then grabbed my arm – and pulled it up behind my back – much like the self defence method – and rammed her elbow into my shoulder…and as I lay there screaming.. literally – she was shouting. So for a while.. I screamed.. she shouted.. I screamed.. she shouted.. I screamed.. and she shouted.. and I lay thinking why is nothing ever easy? And then that was that I was free to go.. I paid my money. And I entered the world once more.. exposed.. relaxed.. less prude and at one with my femininity. But not in a rush to go back just yet…