DATING DIARY + CRYSTAL FIGHTERS DOWNLOAD

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I’m not really one for talking about my dating escapades. Online. Kinda personal stuff isn’t it? However.. with a few disastrous dates behind me – I’ve been reflecting recently on the kind of men I seem to attract. So I thought I’d do bit of a blog on them. Not all of them at once though. Also. I’ve just watched Girls and to be fair perhaps I need to ditch a bit of this British prudism I seem to be carrying around. Also my mate said it would be funny so here goes.

Let’s talk about MAN NUMBER ONE. In this instant… I’ll call him Louis. Oh Louis..

I met this guy… on NYE. He was (or is cos he’s not dead) a little older than I.. he’d studied at Oxford (sexy no?) and looked just like Louis Theroux (hence the nickname). So after a few smiles and teasing a coffee that would turn into dinner was booked in to the diary. We met up a few times…as friends, but there was an underlying attraction. We met up for coffee one evening…and I’m not really sure what led me to ask this question… but the words just spilled out of my mouth.. ‘So…have you ever slept with a prostitute?’. ‘Yeah’ he bluntly replied.

Very honest. I was shocked. I hadn’t actually had a man be so brutally and directly honest with me.

‘What? Really?! How many!?’… I enquired…with my mouth a little agape at this point.  ‘Oh loads. Probably hundreds.. when I was living in the middle east.. it was more like girls who hung around and it wasn’t like giving them money directly they just hung about and we’d give them cash to buy things. But I got Gonorrhoea and that freaked me out so I came back’.

Wow. I was a little taken aback. At the sheer honesty. Grateful though. However…my brain had just taken him out of my ‘potential’ compartment and swiftly put him in the ‘no go’ area.  Which was a shame. But ya know. But saying that – we were only friends though right? And maybe I’d got it all wrong and he wasn’t interested in me at all. We sat uncomfortably opposite each other…’I kinda wish I hadn’t told you that…’ he said.

A few weeks later I got the text. The booty call text… it was late…he was drunk…  ‘wanna get a taxi to mine?’.

There’s open minded and then there’s.. open minded. Ya get me?

Oh Louis…Louis Louis Louis…oh dear…

ART NEWS: Date for the diary – Ben Oakley Gallery presents new works by David Bray and Mark Powell… 16th – 26th May

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MUSIC: Listen to CRYSTAL FIGHTERS ‘CAVE RAVE’ album sampler HERE which will be released on the 27th May:

FREE DOWNLOAD You & I (Gigamesh remix):

Have a good day. BeckiXx

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